Yesterday kicked off as a very bright and beautiful Sunday that I was so excited about despite failing to attend church. Latter in the day I was to attend a friend’s wedding meeting somewhere around Mengo, Kampala. However, the beautiful day ended on a very bad note for me. What happened to me at the meeting was terrible.
Either my expectations were too high or too low but, as far as first impression is concerned, I was extremely disappointed. I vowed never to attend another wedding meeting unless otherwise. I understand that it is a norm for couples intending to get married to invite family members, relatives and friends for wedding meetings to help them plan for the ceremony.
In them I thought they seek moral guidance, advice and financial assistance from well-wishers. However, these meetings have turned into something else, a burden and have become a sugar-coated way of begging if not exploitation of others.
Since I don’t drive and given the nature of our transport system, I found myself five minutes late for the meeting. But as soon as I reached the place, before I could even say hello to the people already seated, the chairman of the meeting fined me 10,000 for coming late.
With many serious faces staring at me, I was forced to dig into my shallow pockets and pay the fee. But can you imagine, they had only said the opening prayer by the time I arrived. Then there was the chairman’s bag.
After that, the meeting started and about an hour into the discussions, the chairman read my name among the list of selected friends and relatives that could contribute about 600,000+ shillings towards the cause.
With many serious faces staring at me, I was forced to dig into my shallow pockets and pay the fee. But can you imagine, they had only said the opening prayer by the time I arrived. Then there was the chairman’s bag.
After that, the meeting started and about an hour into the discussions, the chairman read my name among the list of selected friends and relatives that could contribute about 600,000+ shillings towards the cause.
Oh God!!!! What do wedding organisers and couples think? Suddenly people have the illusion that if they have something going on in the agenda of their lives, then it should come top of your list of issues to handle. I find it very selfish though.
Before the end of the meeting, there was a small auction of a sort. The item was a pair of nice glasses probably bought from somewhere in Kikubo. When the bidding started, then they introduced a fee of touching the auction item.
Before I knew it, members had started picking on me in an embarrassing manner and the comic chairman still wanted to capitalise on me in a joking way of a sort. It was I either buy the glasses whose biding price had already reached 50,000 or else dance for the small congregation. Little did they know that I was a hard nut to crack and that’s when I stormed out of the meeting.
Couples today make their wedding budgets with their financial-eyes in the pockets of others without the smallest glimpse of shame in them. To add insult to injury, these budgets are overwhelming big because they want to have a fancy wedding like the one of Mutasa Kefero’s daughter that they once saw on TV. Come on people!!! That is day dreaming.
Remember that even the ever buzzing wedding messages are to some people very annoying. Offering people pledge cards would be by far better an idea than inviting people every weekend for those extortion and exploitative meetings.
As you plan a wedding, the last thing you should expect is huge contributions from friends and family. You must be very realistic and considerate. The people you expect to make those enormous contributions also have other personal problems and obligations that must be given attention if not first priority compared to your wedding.
In fact, I advise that you draw a budget that you yourselves as a couple together with your families can finance without taking a loan or having to sell off any assets to have it happen. When you reach out to those other relatives and friends and they make some good contributions, then you can expand the budget accordingly.
Make it simple and afford.
Robert.k.circles@gmail.com
